Monday, September 19, 2005
Willing to try new things
Sometimes individuals using the goal program become disheartened when they realize that after setting their goals, the temptations to recommitt the act they are avoiding will still arise. While any goal program hopes to minimize the chances for failure, and ours in particular tries to keep us from tempting situations, inevitably, temptation will occur. Even if it were possible to completely avoid the situations where we normally mess up, the fact is that when working with addictions part of you is going to crave what you're trying leave behind. Even if you have completely changed your ways, thoughts will come, desires will come. An important part of the goal program is defining what you're going to do in such a situation. What will you do when despite your best efforts, you still find yourself face to face with everything you've wanted to get away from, but for someone reason seem drawn to. You know as well as I that if you entertain the thought, a brief second is all that you need before certain emotions are swelling within you and you can't think straight or even remember what it is you were working so hard against. Before those emotions swell up, or as soon as you recognize them, you need to do everything you can to focus on your alternate activity or the back up plan that you have prepared in case of a surprise attach such as that. With something definite to focus on, and a goal that you will be reporting later that day or week, you can hopefully focus just long enough to get yourself out of the situation and thinking straight again. If it turns out that your back up plan didn't hold your attention like you'd hoped it would, then don't worry. You've been through this before and it's a learning experience. Choose a new plan. Don't be afraid to try something that you think might work but you've never actually tried. Just don't go back to setting the same goals you've always set and just thinking that things will be different this time, because this time you're really committed and you obviously weren't this last time. You know you were committed when you made the goals and it's not your committment that's going to get you through it. It is in part, keeping yourself separated from the addiction long enough that you can begin to work on the mighty change you've been seeking for. If you want to achieve things that you have never achieved, then you have to be willing to do things that you've never done before. (I'll try and look up that quote to give credit where it's deserved.) Well, I hope that you're doing well and that the goal program can be more of a help for you with that tidbit of information. Good luck.
Dan
Dan
