Via Dumb Little Man blog, there are 10 tips for a successful first year of marriage. I agreed with just about all of them, except for number one, which I mentioned in the comments. Point 1 states that you should approach the marriage with a 50/50 attitude, expecting to give your fair share. My disagreement was that a 50/50 attitude magically does not equal 100%. When you feel like you're giving 50, you're fair share, your spouse probably feels like you're giving less or he/she is giving more. Approach it with the 80/20 expectation, where more is going to be required than your fair share and somehow it will work out to equal 100% of what you need. Another commentor stated that she believed you needed to approach it with 100% attitude. I disagree with that also because that would imply that everything depends on you and you have to do everything, you can't expect anything from your partner. Obviously, this can cause more problems that it solves. There's no partnership there. The point is, don't be counting up who's turn it is to do chore a or b. Do it even when you did it last time. Give a little bit more. I heard recently one woman's advice saying that her first attitude in the beginning of the marriage was to hold back, to give herself over completely. When she did this, her husband responded in same. When she completely trusted and gave herself over, he responded equally. When you give more than your fair share, your spouse will most likely do the same. That is what a marriage needs.

I also mentioned in the comments something I read in the book, "Men of Valor" by Robert Millet. In any relationship, he has two pieces of advice that he believes removes most contention and arguments.

1. Choose not to be offended
2. Assume the best (referring to another's intentions, I believe)

Now, that's some good advice. It seems like a lot of relationships, including relationships in church callings, between friends, siblings, etc, would be greatly affected if we all followed those two pieces of advice.

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